AVRIL

Dear God, You stand when all else falls.
You make the impossible,possible.
You are the only truth

Benjamin, 6th Jan , ♥


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“You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess”

March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010

I need to blog, i need to let it all out.
I feel so suffocated now, its like the feeling two years back.
No words to explain, no words to describe.
Its just a feeling of having a huge rope tying around your chest, stopping you from breathing.
I think the reason is that its the last day of work tmr, and i can't take it.
Since 9th june, 've been working in taka for approx 9 hours a day.
As time passes, grown attached to the place and people there.
Tmr, the last day, i have no idea how to react. I gotta feeling i'll just snip an emotion nerve or something and start my mood swings.
I've made some awesome friends there, and it is all ending tmr.
We will all be leading our own lives , all back to normal.
Continuing to study, blah blah.
This holiday seemed like a fairytale to me, but once the clock strikes 12 tmr, i'm back to the harsh reality.
Alot of things happened recently, you may know, you may not know.
But sometimes, i'm tired of acting like everything's fine when its actually not.
Its like putting on a mask for every different occasion.
Sometimes i wonder who i will be without my mask.
Most prolly i wont even know myself. I've stuffed alot of things in my heart, think its gonna explode really soon.
I have no idea how to tell people, cos apparently, they have their own things to worry about.
My heart feels broken right now.
Shattered into pieces, can't glue it back. I feel like crying my eyes out, lie in the bed, never wake up. Can i?
I have no idea how to speak my mind now, cos i know if i speak my mind, alot of things wil turn out differently.
Is it wrong of me to hide my real feelings? Can you tell me what to do?
I feel helpless, i feel useless. I can't even settle my own issues , esp emotions.
I let my emotions get me, and now, i'm better off dead.